“My voice is for shouting in classroom, not choir” – Lady shares her hilarious choir experience
A Nigerian lady identified as Okih Bukola has sparked laughter online after sharing a funny story about her past experience in a church choir.
The lady shared the story on her Facebook page, recounting how different church units tried to recruit her shortly after she got married and began attending her husband’s church.
Different Church Units Tried to Recruit Her
According to her, several groups in the church began approaching her to join their units.
She wrote: “When I got married and started attending my husband’s church, different units started dragging me like pounded yam and egusi.
‘Sister Bukky join ushering.’
‘Sister Bukky join drama.’
‘Sister Bukky join choir.’
Choir ke??
I said God forbid affliction to repeat itself.”
Bukola explained that she had already experienced choir life during her university fellowship days, and the experience was not pleasant.
Her University Choir Experience
Sharing what happened back then, she said the choir master once attempted to test her vocal ability.
“Because I have tasted choir before in university fellowship and it did not end in praise and worship… it ended in confusion and deliverance.
Our fellowship choir master that time was a patient man.
A very patient man. A man that deserves national award.
He said, ‘Let me test your range.’
He said, ‘Sing alto.’
I sang it.
He frowned.
He said, ‘Try soprano.’
I sang it.
He removed his glasses.
He said, ‘Okay… tenor.’
I sang it.
He blinked.
Finally, I sang the one that only me and my ancestors understood.
That day, the man realized that my voice is not in the register… my voice is in the spirit.”
Her Role as a Backup Singer
Despite the confusion, she said the choir still allowed her remain in the group and made her a backup singer.
“They still allowed me stay because it is house of God and they didn’t want to discourage future disaster.
They made me backup singer.
You would think backup singer is easy.
My own backup was doing hide and seek.
Anytime the lead singer reach dangerous zone, I will off my mic and start shaking it.
Tap tap tap.
I will be looking at technical unit like:
‘Brother… something is wrong oo.’
Technical unit will change battery.
Still same thing.
They will adjust wire.
Still same thing.
But once the lead singer escape from high tension area, I will on my mic again.
‘Hallelujah somebodyyyyy…’”
The Day She Was Asked to Sing Alone
Bukola said the choir eventually decided to give her a special ministration.
“Technical unit got tired of my nonsense.
One day, assistant choir leader said:
‘Bukky, we want to use you for special ministration the backup wey you sing has do.’
That was how they promoted me as if I told them I wasn’t okay where I was.
Guess the song.
STAND AMAZED IN YOUR PRESENCE BY SINACH.
SINACH???
SINACH that sings like she has direct WhatsApp number of God??”
The Embarrassing Performance
She said the choir prayed and rehearsed with her before the big day, and she stepped forward confidently.
“The D-Day came.
I wore choir robe.
Black, white and touch of red.
I looked like weapon fashioned against Satan.
Confidence full my body.
I carried microphone like I carried destiny.
Keyboardist who happened to be one of my village people gave me key wey reach heaven.
Instead of me to come down, I followed him go.
I started:
‘STAND AMAZED IN YOUR PRESENNNNCEEEE…’
Church quiet.
Everybody focus.
When I reached the dangerous part:
‘THERE IS NO ONE LIKE YOU JESUS… THERE IS NO ONE LIKE YOOOOOOOOOUUUUU’
My voice logged out.
Not cracked.
Not broke.
It logged out completely.”
Reactions in the Church
She said the moment became very embarrassing as people reacted in different ways.
“Silence.
Only keyboard was still alive.
Hot tears started rolling down my face.
My stomach started biting me.
Small urine introduced itself.
I opened one eye small.
What I saw finished me.
One mama was shaking her head praying to God to deliver from the spirit of singing nonsense.
One papa was speaking in tongues for my release.
One brother was looking at ceiling like:
‘Lord, why?’”
She Finally Accepted Her Calling
After the service, Bukola said she finally accepted that choir singing was not meant for her.
“After the service they said:
‘Bukky well done.’
WELL DONE KE?
That was the day I accepted my calling.
My voice is not for choir.
My voice is for:
• shouting in classroom
• calling students that are running
• and singing inside toilet
Since that day, if I enter church and hear choir rehearsal, I greet them from afar.
Because some battles are not yours to fight.
If you know your voice is also a public nuisance, gather here let us form association”
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